Kindness is Not Weakness, Even in Prison

 One saying commonly used by prisoners is, "Don't mistake my kindness for weakness." Ironically, this is exactly how many prisoners view kindness -- as a weakness that can be exploited. Whether the kindness comes from another prisoner, a corrections officer, or a family member or friend, some prisoners are quick to exploit it. 

This was a struggle for me when I first entered prison, because I believe that people should be treated with kindness and respect. I quickly learned that kindness can be a weakness if it is not accompanied by awareness and confidence. It took me some time to find the right balance so that the risk of exploitation did not harden me to the humanity of each person I encountered throughout the day. This is a delicate balance that requires emotional intelligence to get right. I still get it wrong sometimes. 

Few prisoners or officers make kindness a practice in prison, but there are exceptions. The majority of these exceptions are because of the expression of someone's genuine faith. Whether faith or something else is the motivation, though, kindness is simple, and it may make the difference in someone's life. 

Kindness doesn't have to be complicated or costly. Sometimes kindness simply means greeting someone with a smile, saying, "Please" and "Thank you," recognizing when someone is down and encouraging them, or praising someone for a job well done. 

Cleaning bathrooms is one of the least desirable jobs available in prison. When I see someone doing a good job cleaning a bathroom, I thank them and tell them I appreciate their work. This simple act of kindness goes a long way in an environment where people complain so much, even when a prisoner's job (like cleaning) inconveniences them. 

Some people may view kindness as weakness, but I see it as a powerful tool that tears down walls and builds foundations, and that has the potential to change the culture where we live. And let's be honest, this world could use a lot more kindness!

The next time you're in the grocery line or in a restaurant, for example, try being kind. Greet the clerk with a smile and genuinely ask, "How are you today?" Thank them for their service, too. At restaurants, write, "Thank you for your service!" and leave a tip that shows you mean it. Choose kindness even when the food or service disappoints you. 

You might be surprised by how much it brightens your own day when you choose to be kind to someone else.