Are your dreams bigger than your memories?

Memories are powerful forces in our lives. They have the power to cause debilitating fear because of a past experience, and to trigger the release of dopamine in our brains because of a past pleasure. In fact, I dare say that memories are one of the most powerful influences in our lives. 

But memories sometimes have a way of being an inaccurate picture of reality. The pleasure of a new life dampens the memory of the pain of childbirth with time (or so I'm told). And the trauma of a bad experience can overshadow the good memories of the same time. 

Memories can also be a motivation to help us make better choices. As we think back to the results of poor past choices our memories can be the push we need to choose rightly this time. 

Sometimes though, memories can hold us back from growing in our life. They can be an anchor that keeps us tied to the harbor of our past instead of the wind that blows us into a better future. Dreams and aspirations are important to motivate us towards growth, but if we are held back by the significance of our memories of the past we might be robbing ourselves of our future potential. 

So let me ask you this: Are your dreams bigger than your memories?

Should I Emulate You?

I recently heard a statistic that if you came to prison before your 25th birthday that you stood a nearly 100% chance of returning to prison, if you are ever released. 

That's a truly sobering statistic, but the sad fact is that it makes sense. It's said that whatever state of maturity you were when you came to prison, that's where you stay. That can't possibly be true for everyone, but prison has a way of keeping people stuck at their particular level of maturity. If you aren't proactive in educating yourself and developing a healthy psychology, and a meaningful spiritual self, you most certainly are likely to get stuck in an unhealthy immaturity. 

Unfortunately, the DOC doesn't provide many resources or incentives to help one achieve these objectives. Frankly, I don't believe they are interested in putting in the work necessary to truly reduce recidivism. But that's only part of the problem.

There's such a strong pull for the younger men in prison to belong to something that will help them feel significant, and standing out, or seeking to educate yourself, or correct behaviors that are accepted by your peers is counterproductive to these short-sighted desires. 

Most men in prison didn't have mature men to emulate, and coming to prison doesn't fix that problem. But there are a few who can make a difference, no matter how insignificant is seems. I've also learned through experience that people have to want to change before it's possible to help them change. It's easy to get cynical in prison and believe that nobody wants to change, but they're here. You just have to keep your eyes and ears open and catch them before they get sucked into the negativity that runs rampant in prison and lose their desire to become better men. 

It's not easy, but I'm determined to make a difference where I am, whenever I can. And that starts by being someone I'd be proud to have someone else emulate.

Tribute to Grandpa Bauer

I was saddened to hear about the passing of my grandpa Bauer recently. I have many fond memories of my grandpa and he will be dearly missed! I'll miss his hardy laugh and huge smile. I'll miss his deep love for his family. He was a very successful man who thrived in a leadership role in business and also used those skills to do good through the Shriners and Masons. I always admired his relationship with my grandma too who I'm sure is missing him terribly. I love you grandpa... thanks for everything!