I've been in prison now for nearly four years and I'm still blown away by the rampant ignorance I see and hear every day. Just the other day I heard an argument over the number of U.S. states. The guy arguing swore up and down there were fifty-two states. He couldn't name them, but still swore he was right. What's worse? Of the dozen or so people he asked, over HALF said fifty-two! Many claimed that's what they were taught in school.
United States geography aside, the more offending ignorance is the pervasive racism. I refuse to use the term, "reverse-racism" as if racism originated with and is capitalized only by whites.
There is certainly a segment of the white inmate population who espouse the ignorance of racism. But perhaps because they are the minority in prison, whites are much more discriminated against. What's most surprising to me is the racism against light-skinned blacks. Perhaps because their blood is somehow 'tainted' by their white ancestry, as if they had any control over that.
This racism is fed by the ignorant teachings of so-called religious organizations who feed their followers the drivel of race superiority. but I think these belief systems originate in the families and cultures the inmates grew up in.
Maybe racism isn't as strong as it used to be in the free-world, but in prison it's still very much alive.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Shame Interrupted
I'm reading an excellent book
right now titled, 'Shame Interrupted' by Edward T. Welch. It's an easy to read,
excellent book about how God fits into the healing of our pain of worthlessness
and rejection.
Most prisoners deal with feelings of shame, worthlessness, and rejection. Some put on fronts that they are proud of what they did, and I suspect some actually are. But I would bet that most, if they are honest, would admit that they not only feel regret and shame for doing what landed them in prison, but that shame played a very integral part in their lives prior to committing their crimes.
Shame can be caused by what you did, or by what was done to you. It can be caused by addictions, failures, parents who ignored or belittled you, abuse, previous felony convictions, or a host of other things.
What really stands out to me is how shame can be a huge factor in what motivated someone to commit a crime, but that one of the first consequences of those crimes is more shame. It's a repeating cycle of compounding shame.
Shame for oneself, which leads to behaviors to attempt to bury that shame, which leads to committing crimes to support those behaviors (or sometimes the behaviors themselves are crimes), which leads to shame for committing crimes.
Of course, the point of incarceration is not to deal with the underlying causes of why someone committed crime in the first place. It's about separation, which only reinforces the feelings of worthlessness and rejection.
After serving their time, ex-convicts must still deal with the shame of their crimes. When applying for jobs there are huge gaps in their employment history, that little box to check on employment applications ("Have you ever been convicted of a crime?"), and some even have to register as a sex offender, further compounding their own shame.
This issue is a complicated and costly one. It’s not easy to deal with the source of a problem. It's easier to put a Band-Aid on it and hope it goes away.
Today's incarceration-happy society would rather hack at the branches of crime by locking up the criminals and throwing away the key instead of targeting the causes of these crimes, and using an approach of restorative justice. Attacking the effect and not the cause will never solve the problem.
Shame is a cancer that, if left untreated, results in imprisonment, whether physically or in your own mind.
Understanding the cause of shame is important, but so is understanding how God fits into the solution. If you're dealing with shame in your own life, I highly recommend that you read Welch's book.
Most prisoners deal with feelings of shame, worthlessness, and rejection. Some put on fronts that they are proud of what they did, and I suspect some actually are. But I would bet that most, if they are honest, would admit that they not only feel regret and shame for doing what landed them in prison, but that shame played a very integral part in their lives prior to committing their crimes.
Shame can be caused by what you did, or by what was done to you. It can be caused by addictions, failures, parents who ignored or belittled you, abuse, previous felony convictions, or a host of other things.
What really stands out to me is how shame can be a huge factor in what motivated someone to commit a crime, but that one of the first consequences of those crimes is more shame. It's a repeating cycle of compounding shame.
Shame for oneself, which leads to behaviors to attempt to bury that shame, which leads to committing crimes to support those behaviors (or sometimes the behaviors themselves are crimes), which leads to shame for committing crimes.
Of course, the point of incarceration is not to deal with the underlying causes of why someone committed crime in the first place. It's about separation, which only reinforces the feelings of worthlessness and rejection.
After serving their time, ex-convicts must still deal with the shame of their crimes. When applying for jobs there are huge gaps in their employment history, that little box to check on employment applications ("Have you ever been convicted of a crime?"), and some even have to register as a sex offender, further compounding their own shame.
Society cares very little about seeing ex-convicts live productive lives free
from committing further crimes. The emphasis is on separating and isolating
ex-convicts, not dealing with the issues that led to their crimes in the first
place.
This issue is a complicated and costly one. It’s not easy to deal with the source of a problem. It's easier to put a Band-Aid on it and hope it goes away.
Today's incarceration-happy society would rather hack at the branches of crime by locking up the criminals and throwing away the key instead of targeting the causes of these crimes, and using an approach of restorative justice. Attacking the effect and not the cause will never solve the problem.
Shame is a cancer that, if left untreated, results in imprisonment, whether physically or in your own mind.
Understanding the cause of shame is important, but so is understanding how God fits into the solution. If you're dealing with shame in your own life, I highly recommend that you read Welch's book.
Congruent Character
I was moved this morning as I
heard a grown man honor his father when he said, 'There was never a gap between
what dad taught and what he lived. His integrity was solid in all he did.'
Of course, I wish I had lived as such so my children could say the same about me. How confusing it must be to our children when we tell them one thing, and do another ourselves! We weaken the impact of our lessons when we fail to live them in our own lives.
This is all connected to authentic living. We must take daily, incremental steps to develop congruency in our character, not only for the sake of our children and others we influence, but for our own good too.
It is exhausting and confusing to our own selves when we say one thing, but do another. When we claim to believe one way, but act another.
Since actions are the fruit of thoughts, we must be vigilant to cultivate good patterns of thought. To reject thoughts of hatred, self-doubt, selfishness, unfaithfulness, or anything else that would weaken our will to live what we say we believe.
We must feed and nourish thoughts that yield the fruit of right living: Peace, love, forgiveness, temperance, hope and others.
Congruent character begins in the mind
Of course, I wish I had lived as such so my children could say the same about me. How confusing it must be to our children when we tell them one thing, and do another ourselves! We weaken the impact of our lessons when we fail to live them in our own lives.
This is all connected to authentic living. We must take daily, incremental steps to develop congruency in our character, not only for the sake of our children and others we influence, but for our own good too.
It is exhausting and confusing to our own selves when we say one thing, but do another. When we claim to believe one way, but act another.
Since actions are the fruit of thoughts, we must be vigilant to cultivate good patterns of thought. To reject thoughts of hatred, self-doubt, selfishness, unfaithfulness, or anything else that would weaken our will to live what we say we believe.
We must feed and nourish thoughts that yield the fruit of right living: Peace, love, forgiveness, temperance, hope and others.
Congruent character begins in the mind
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