Powerless Because of Crime

I remember as a child coming home from a camping trip when we lived in Southern California to discover our home had been burglarized. I remember how powerless my parent's felt and even we kids were affected by the crime. 

Whether the crime is a break-in, a robbery, an assault, or nearly any other crime, the victim ends up feeling powerless and the criminal justice process does little to restore power to the victim. Instead, the process is designed to punish an offender for breaking a law, while it largely ignores empowering the victim with a voice in the outcome. 

Offenders also experience powerlessness in prison as they become completely dependent on others, whether it is family and friends or the state. Prison itself promotes a learned helplessness and dependency rather than promoting responsibility, independence, and accountability. 

Prisoners must take initiative to develop for themselves the responsibility that independence and accountability require. This means learning to manage finances and time wisely, taking an active role in taking classes offered by the prisons or through educational programs, and most importantly beginning to repair the broken relationships caused by one's crimes. 

The very nature of crime and prison creates a wake of powerlessness, but if offenders are to become a part of the process that returns power to their victims, they must begin by taking responsibility for themselves.

If I hear one more complaint...

I just came back from lunch in the chow hall at the prison in which I am housed. Now, let me first state that meal time in prison is nothing to look forward to, but most days, if one is willing to eat what he is given, he will not leave hungry. The food is not great, or even good most of the time, but at least it is something to eat. 

While I sat at chow eating my White Castle-sized single hamburger, a guy at my table complained non-stop. The burger was a joke. The potato salad had too many onions and celery. Here we go again with the beans. And why would the Warden and food service supervisor show up on one of the better meals and not one of the crappy meals? My first thought was that will all the complaining on a "better" meal, I would hate to hear what he had to say about a worse meal. 

My second thought was that prisoners are often very ungrateful. Every day, from my first encounter with other inmates in the early morning while brushing my teeth, to my last interaction at night before bed, I hear non-stop complaining. It is no wonder the prison officials do not take legitimate complaints seriously.

I wonder if I heard this much complaining before coming to prison? Sure, everyone has something in their lives they would like to see be different, but I have never been surrounded by people with such a negative outlook on life until I came to prison. It's very draining.

This year, I purposed to work on developing a grateful attitude, even in prison, so maybe that makes me more sensitive to the incessant complaining I hear around me. 

I do not want to be miserable all my life, and since I can not change my circumstances, the only thing I can change is my attitude. It is not easy when so much seems to go wrong, but by keeping a positive attitude and being grateful when I feel like complaining, I find myself so much more peaceful. 

Try to catch yourself complaining today and instead of voicing that complaint, look for something for which to express gratefulness. It is all a matter of perspective. 

For me, I am very grateful for such a beautiful, sunny day that makes it easier for me to walk off my lunch and give me an appetite for another meal tonight.

White Man Can't Jump

Four weeks ago I injured myself trying to box jump onto a concrete pad. I walked, rather briskly, to medical after busting my shins open to where my legs were pouring blood. 

For the first time since I have been in prison I had a positive experience with the medical care I received. The nurses were quick to provide medical care, and they did it while treating me with the respect of a human being (after they stopped laughing and joking about my clumsy attempt to jump!) I was patched up and received four stitches in one leg and had the other leg bandaged. The doctor who stitched me up onsite told me I would be called out in two weeks to medical to have my stitches removed and my wounds observed. 

I was encouraged by the treatment I received until after sixteen days I still had not been called to have my stitches removed. I sent a kite to medical asking what happened and five days later I was finally called to medical. When the nurse asked me why, three weeks later, I still had my stitches in, I told her the doctor said he'd schedule me to have them removed. The nurse's response? "Oh, and you believed him?!"

As the nurse reopened my wound so she could remove the now deeply scabbed over stitches, she asked if I had used antibiotic cream. I told her I had asked the doctor about if I should and he had told me it wasn't necessary. The nurse disagreed. 

Such is the quality of our medical care in prison. 

I am still healing and I expect I won't have a career as a leg model, or as anything that requires me to leap higher than the height of my own knees - because this white man clearly can't jump!

Do You Know Why This Happened To Me?

One question victims of crime often want the answer to is "why?" Why was I made a victim? Why did the offender choose to commit this crime? Why did he target me? Some victims may even wonder why God would let something happen to them like it did. 

Perhaps one of the most important steps in restorative justice practices is the opportunity for the victim to get answers to some of these questions from the offender. This sometimes happens in a victim offender mediation. Oftentimes, prisoners may not know the answers to these questions. their work toward restorative justice is to begin examining themselves and seeking to understand for themselves the motivation behind their criminal behavior. When an offender truly wants to change his life, he must understand the why, the cause, for his criminal behavior.

The very work an offender does to answer the question of why he committed a criminal act will work to lead that offender towards avoiding this behavior in the future. Answering the question "why?" may be the most important step in an offender's own healing. And by giving this answer to the victim, and showing a true insight into his behavior, an offender can become a part of the healing process for the victim of his crime.

I do not know whether or not anyone can adequately answer the question of why God allows innocent people to suffer the effects of crime. But perhaps by dealing with the human element we can begin to see spiritual dimensions of living in a fallen world. Maybe in answering the question "why?" we can begin to speak about what forgiveness looks like and how an offender can help restore his victim and be restored himself in the process.