Tuesday, July 20, 2021

Crossing Paths with Other Travelers

 Recently, a new group of prisoners transfered to MTU, the prison where I am housed. Most were for the new cohort of college students and a few new Vocational Village trades students. 


Anytime new prisoners ride in, it's inevitable that someone knows them from another prison, and occasionally from the free world. I've known several of the new guys who rode in, but I knew none of them well. Other prisoners had been close in the past to some of the new guys. 

With dozens of prisons in Michigan, it's entirely possible to meet a guy at one prison and never see him again when either person rides out to another prison. It's also possible to end up on the same prison rotation and be at multiple joints together. 

Since we live 24/7 with each other, it's common to develop close friendships with some other prisoners, but there's always the risk of permanent separation hanging over one's head. Prisoners are not allowed by policy to communicate with each other from prison to prison. Apparently it's a security risk. 

There is a certain risk that some of these relationships might be based on criminal activity, but many relationships between prisoners are mutually beneficial. I personally have formed friendships with several prisoners over the years who have helped me to become a better person. They have encouraged personal, spritual, and emotional growth. They have helped me through tough situations, helped me to get a clearer picture of things I need to work on in myself. Some have become mentors of sorts.

These are the sorts of friendships that are difficult, in my experience, to find in the free world. Perhaps that's because people are just really busy with jobs and families and hobbies. I don't know. But many of the best friendships I've had have been with other prisoners. 

The problem is that when someone leaves prison, parole policy prohibits that former prisoner from "associating with" other felons, including those still in prison. This parole stipulation undoubtedly has a positive purpose--to prevent someone from easily falling back into criminal ways. But when someone has formed healthy, positive friendships with other prisoners, and at the same time has lost many friends from the free world, it means those who parole are often isolated from relationships that keep them grounded. 

Despite our crimes, many prisoners are normal people. That means we have our brokenness, like everyone else, but we also have the ability to be wonderful companions, friends, mentors, husbands, and fathers. We might have been terrible at these relationships in the past, but a lot of prisoners experience significant growth in prison. Isolated time for self-reflection and the support of others who have gained wisdom from their own journeys helps with that transformation.

Whether or not we'll be able to connect again after prison, I'm grateful for the other prisoners who have had a positive influence in my life. I hope I, too, have been able to be that mentor or friend to help another prisoner on his own journey of transformation. I hope that I have learned how to be a better brother, son, husband, mentor, and friend outside of prison as well. 

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