I recently heard someone say that everyone needs three things to feel significance in their lives:
Something to Do
Someone to Love
Something to Look Forward To
This struck me as important for prisoners because prisoners have nothing to do, no one to love (and they don't know how if they do), and nothing to look forward to.
The "Something to Do" is something with significance. It's not just busy work, but something that makes a difference. Anyone can busy themselves with work, or play, but if they have nothing to do in their lives that has significance than it's not really "Something to Do".
Loving someone and being loved by someone are both basic human needs. It's difficult to feel significance in your life if you don't have someone in your life to love. You need someone to share things with, both joys and sorrows, and someone who loves you unconditionally. Many prisoners feel unloved long before they committed their crimes, but coming to prison only exacerbates the problem. Those who have someone to love (and love them back) often don't know how to have a successful relationship and end up sabotaging that relationship.
"Something to look forward to" is the hope that everyone needs in the future. It may be hope for a goal achieved, a relationship healed, a successful business, children safely and 'properly' raised, or a host of other possibilities. But prison is filled with hopelessness. Men and women who look forward to the time when they may be released from prison and are unsure of what awaits them on the other side. Perhaps they've been down a long time, or their family support has dies or faded away. Perhaps they have been unable to keep up their skills and don't know what work awaits them. Or perhaps they fear the demons that they will have to face again, drug addiction, alcohol abuse, and other addictions.
Prisoners aren't the only ones who need significance in their life though. Take a little time for some self-examination and ask yourself, "Do I have something to do, someone to love, and something to look forward to?" Maybe it's time to focus on something that will give you significance again.
